Unforgiveable...

There is an article in this week's Newsweek magazine written by one Lisa Miller, who suggests that Barack Obama might actually be the Antichrist. Seriously?

How can a legitimate (or what we thought) news magazine publish something like this. This is full of hate, unforgivable, inexcusable, and down-right DUMB! Anyone who believes that Barack Obama is the Antichrist must be the dumbest person in the world. In fact, dumb doesn't even describe. There is no word for how dumb that person is. Their dumbness transcends any capable way of articulating in the human vocabulary about how dumb they are. They should be burned alive so the world's overall IQ raises.

It is crazy how, when one mentions that you cannot prove God, these religious folk will tell you that some things we are not supposed to believe, but that we are supposed to just have faith.

However, when it comes to the Devil or the Antichrist, everyone ALWAYS has it figured out. In this case, it's simple: Barack Obama is the Antichrist. Oh yeah, that makes sense. God, no, he's too tough to figure out. But the Antichrist, yeah, he has to be Obama. Right? Because Obama's black. And a Democrat. And liberal. So yeah, it makes sense to call him the Antichrist.

Alexander wasn't the Antichrist. He just brutally conquered hundreds of areas around the world. No. Not him.

Vlad the Impaler wasn't the Antichrist. No. He just murdered babies and women by impaling them. No way.

Hitler wasn't the Antichrist. No. He just murdered 6,000,000 Jews. And that's not counting the other people he murdered.

So, Lisa Miller, I get what you're saying: if those people weren't the Antichrist, then IT WOULD HAVE TO BE BARACK OBAMA. YEAH! THAT'S IT!

Barack Obama. Heir to the Dark Lord. Scourge to all those of faith. Eater of babies and such...

Oh. Lisa Miller. Before you write another article for Newsweek, or any other publications, don't forget, before you do:

Take your idea. Write it on the thickest, sharpest piece of paper one can afford. I'm talking about like a $200 piece of paper. You know, the good stuff. Write down your idea. Then, coat it in kerosene. I mean, just douse that mother. Then, sprinkle some crushed red pepper flakes on it. Get it nice and coated. Don't worry, the kerosene will help it stick. Then roll that piece of paper up. Roll it up good, like you're about to hit the dog on the head or something. Then, proceed to shove it up your ass. Because that's where most of your ideas come from. Because your head is up your ass.

Dumb bitch.

44% and Counting...

My crusade against the film Twilight continues. It has raised since last we discussed this vile and horrible thing. The film is now at a 44% down at Rotten Tomatoes (be sure to visit the link on the right). Also, here are some short excerpts from reviews that some reputable critics have posted. I retrieved these condensed quotes from The Progressive Puppy blog, which you can also find a link to on your right.

Roger Ebert: If there were no vampires in "Twilight," it would be a thin-blooded teenage romance, about two good-looking kids who want each other so much because they want each other so much. Variety: The result is a supernatural romance in which the supernatural and romantic elements feel rushed, unformed and insufficiently motivated, leaving audiences with little to do but shrug. Slant Magazine: In essence, what we have here is a laughable, sex-free gothic tweener variation of those dime-store page-turners featuring Fabio on their cover. Newsday: Meyer's novel at least had a sense of humor, but the film version is deathly serious about its silliness. Film Journal: Of course, none of these complaints will matter one iota to Twilight's devoted fanbase, who, to be perfectly honest, would probably have been completely satisfied if the film just consisted of a shirtless Pattinson reading the book aloud for two hours. Film Threat: With his yearning eyes and tortured past, Edward is the romantic ideal for most 13-year old girls (and some boys) - he’s androgynously gorgeous, has a dope ride, and doesn’t want to do anything but talk about your feelings and snuggle. It would appear that in addition to robbing his brood of their need for blood, Carlisle also removed their balls. USA Today: Despite questionable casting, wooden acting, laughable dialogue and truly awful makeup, nothing is likely to stop young girls from swarming to this kitschy adaptation of Stephenie Meyer's popular novel.

Season Finale...

It was a sad thing that two of the most kick-ass shows on HBO ended their seasons last night. Both True Blood and Entourage ended and what be back until next summer I believe.

Some thoughts:

True Blood is the best show HBO has since The Sopranos. It is gritty, sexy, violent, and just damn interesting. This is the real vampire OG, none of that bullshit Twilight has got going on. Last night we learned who has been killing all of Sookey's friends and family and the motivation behind it, which I found very interesting. The show echoes prejudices in the real world, which is almost scary. One of the more interesting things to happen was that a representative from a crazy ass church called The Children of the Sun recruited Jason. This church is all about destroying vampires and "saving" humanity, which is more than an obvious allusion to how churches in the real world act toward athiests, people of other religions, and homosexuals. Go True Blood!

Entourage had been slacking there for awhile, especially that last few seasons or so. However, I think this finale and the past few episodes has brought it back up to the level it should be. I can't wait for the next season. I hope they have Martin Scorcese as a regular for the time being while Vinny films his movie. And you have to love anything with Meadow Soprano!

Gutentag!

So just something interesting...

I have acquired some Rosetta Stone software, the German version to be exact. I have begun to use it in an attempt to learn one of the coolest languages ever. I'll let you know how it goes...

58 Days Left of Bush!

"Twilight" Movie No Better Than Book

A few weeks ago I posted my thoughts on the first book in Twilight series, affectionately called Twilight. Basically, much like Nickelback, it's just awful and I'm kind of embarresed that I even admitted reading the book on this blog. But more on the subject of things that are terrible...

A close friend of mine, we shall call him BRYAN, dared to bet with me that the film version of the TERRIBLE book would make a grade of 65% or better on the film review web site Rotten Tomatoes (which you can find a link on the left).

If you don't know, Rotten Tomatoes takes most official reviews from critics (not all, but most) and marks whether they are positive or negative, then averages those scores giving a grade for all kinds of films.

Twilight has not even been released yet, but it already has a Rotten Tomatoes grade of 39%. For those of you who have never made bad grades in school, a 39% is a FAIL, or an "F," Bryan. It also happens to be much lower than 65%...I'm just saying.

My prediction and part of the bet was a 45% or lower. What does the winner of the bet get, you ask?

Nothing. Except for me being able to say this...

Suck it Bryan...

However, all reviews are not finished yet and I will keep you posted on the score until it looks like it's not going to change much. We shall see...

Nickelback oh Nickelback...

I know everyone probably knows this...but the "rock" band Nickelback is just terrible. Every single they put out more and more resembles the last one they put out, and so on and so on. Eventually, they'll probably start releasing the same single every six months (if you think they're not already doing that).

Seriously though, they're just awful and I wish they would go away.

True Nightmares

I had a wonderful dream last night. It was about me and a woman whom I can't seem to get over. She was my entire world and it has been awhile. I thought I was getting better about it. Then I had this dream...

It was just about me and her. For some reason, we were walking and talking like things never went wrong and everything was like it used to be. We got into the back seat of some car. And we just sat there and talked. Then we kissed. And we just kept on talking...about life, love...whatever. We were happy and everything was good. It makes me feel good talking about it.

Then I woke up. And let me tell you, that has to be the most horrendous feeling in the world. Little children, maybe even some adults, still get frightened by nightmares they have about monsters, ghosts, or a bad experience they had. But to tell you the truth, I never really have nightmares, and if I did I'm sure I would not be afraid of them.

What does make me feel sick though, what makes me afraid, and sad, and what leaves me longing, are those good dreams. The dreams like this one, where I wake up and face a reality that is nowhere within the spectrum of the dream. In the dream, I was with this girl, happy, content, and satisfied. And I wake up to find her gone and it is heartbreaking. The worst feeling in the world I think. To have a great dream, and to wake up to this. Worse than nightmares.

Nightmares are easy. The good dreams are the hardest to handle.

Interesting...

This was very interesting. This is a list I found on a fellow blog that lists the top 25 news stories you probably won't hear about because THEY don't want you to. Check it out!

#1. Over One Million Iraqi Deaths Caused by US Occupation
# 2 Security and Prosperity Partnership: Militarized NAFTA
# 3 InfraGard: The FBI Deputizes Business
# 4 ILEA: Is the US Restarting Dirty Wars in Latin America?
# 5 Seizing War Protesters’ Assets
# 6 The Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act
# 7 Guest Workers Inc.: Fraud and Human Trafficking
# 8 Executive Orders Can Be Changed Secretly
# 9 Iraq and Afghanistan Vets Testify
# 10 APA Complicit in CIA Torture
# 11 El Salvador’s Water Privatization and the Global War on Terror
# 12 Bush Profiteers Collect Billions From No Child Left Behind
# 13 Tracking Billions of Dollars Lost in Iraq
# 14 Mainstreaming Nuclear Waste
# 15 Worldwide Slavery
# 16 Annual Survey on Trade Union Rights
# 17 UN’s Empty Declaration of Indigenous Rights
# 18 Cruelty and Death in Juvenile Detention Centers
# 19 Indigenous Herders and Small Farmers Fight Livestock Extinction
# 20 Marijuana Arrests Set New Record
# 21 NATO Considers “First Strike” Nuclear Option
# 22 CARE Rejects US Food Aid
# 23 FDA Complicit in Pushing Pharmaceutical Drugs
# 24 Japan Questions 9/11 and the Global War on Terror
# 25 Bush’s Real Problem with Eliot Spitzer

Alaskans Aren't Stupid After All!

Yes, that's right! Despite what you might think due to the never-ending screech of Sarah Palin, people who live in Alaska may not be as bad as we think!

It has been reported, with 100% of the votes in, that Senator Ted Stevens of Alaska, the senator who was recently charged with a number of felonies, has lost the race for US senate. Mark Begrich has beaten Senator...uh...I mean Mr. Stevens by 3,724 votes. If you remember, Stevens' charges were because of corruption within his office

The fact that Ted Stevens was even approaching victory AFTER he was convicted is astounding to me, and made me not like Alaska, which is sad, because I always thought Ice Road Truckers was a good show.

The Awesomeness of Stem Cells

CNN has reported that a woman by the name of Claudia Castillo, age 30, was recently in "stem cell" surgery where she gained a new windpipe out of stem cells. She lost hers due to tuberculosis. This loss inhibited her from doing her daily and domestic activities. The only other option she could try was a surgery that would have had her doctors removing one of her lungs. Instead, due to the WONDERFUL results of stem cell research, she didn't have to go with that option.

This should show everyone the potential for stem cell research and how it can be very useful in all kinds of procedures, from cancer to reconstructive surgery. If you don't already know, stem cells are cells typically taken from the fetuses released when a pregnant woman has an abortion. Right wing-nuts will tell you that this kind of research encourages women to get abortions, but it actually DOESN'T, because women are going to get abortions in this country whether its the law or not. Since it is going to happen anyway, why not make it a law to use what researchers can do help improve the health and quality of life of the country.

It seems that the wingnut argument is as basic as this:

If I have cancer, perhaps stem cell research can help me stay alive. However, I won't get the nessecary treatments because the RIGHT are more concerned with an unborn child.

It is touchy, but if it was my mom, my roommate, or my best friend, I would choose them over someone's unborn child.

LET THEM DO THE RESEARCH!

Depp as Mad Hatter?

If you didn't know, Johnny Depp, whom I like to refer to as the 'Lord of Acting,' will be collaborating once again with Tim Burton, whom I like to refer to as the 'Lord of Directing.' Depp will be playing the Mad Hatter in Burton's Alice in Wonderland. No doubt it is going to be amazing. Anyway, I found this and it is supposedly what Depp will look like. However, in my opinion, it looks a little fake. Either way, it gets one thinking and excited about how kick-ass this film is going to be.

Good Lord...Or Not.

In my seemingly never-ending battle to try and find the good in religion or understand why people subscribe to it, I have run across this little gem on the internet that does the opposite. From the Progressive Puppy:

"A Fairfield, California woman whose car was adorned with celebratory signs for President-elect Barack Obama was singled out by her priest during Sunday Mass at Our Lady of Mount Carmel Church. After humiliating Elizabeth Caster in front of the entire congregation, the Rev. Sebastian Meyer ordered her to leave the church, saying: "We cannot have a car with Obama signs written on it on these premises! And I don't care who Obama is. I want this car off the premises in 10 minutes or it will be towed!"

Wow. That poor lady. Is that how you are supposed to be treated when you join a congregation? If so, I'm glad I never did.

Joe the Fuckwad...

Seriously...when will this guy go away. This fucking idiot knows about as much about politics as I do quantim physics. Hell, I don't even know if I spelled that right. It has recently been announced that Joe the Fucking Motherfuckin Cock-Sucking Redneck Dumb Motherfucker who Doesn't Know Shit about Shit Motherfucker has recently signed a book deal. But it wasn't with a MAJOR publication. Oh no. That would just be wrong. Quote:

"I am not going to a conglomerate that way we actually can get the economy jump started. Like there is five publishing companies in Michigan. There's a couple down in Texas. They are small ones that can handle like 10 or 15,000 copies. I can go to a big one that could handle a million or two. But they don't need the help. They are already rich. So that's spreading the wealth to me."

Spreading the wealth? Hmm...that's funny Joe, considering you probably didn't, and still don't, know what they fuck that meant or you don't realize that the phrase you are uttering is merely a slimeball Republican tactic aimed at convincing Americans that Barack Obama is a socialist/terrorist/communist/Lord of the 9th Ring of Hell and will Disembody Your Children For Your Obedience!

Joe the Plumber. We will never meet. You will never read this, although I hope it happens. But know this:

I hope you choke on your own blood. I hope you find yourself vomiting one day from the Heaven Hill whiskey you bought yourself because your poor white trash simpleton motherfuckin brain can't figure out that whiskey is bad for you, and that you only drank whiskey because you think it's patriotic, and that the vomit gets lodged into your throat. Then I hope you cough, and chunks of it spread down into your respiratory organs and you begin to die a slow and VERY painful death via asphyxiation.

Stop trying to martyr yourself. You are not a normal person. You do not represent hard working Americans. You represent selfish, self-promoting retards that don't know when to stay away from the media because they are too busy listening to their own bullshit, when no one really gives a fuck about you.

You make me increasingly frustrated every time I see a news story about you. MY NEWS SHOULD BE VALUABLE. IT SHOULD INFORM ME ABOUT THE WORLD. NOT ABOUT SOME SCUMFUCKER WHO DECIDED HE FOUND A IDIOTIC FUCKING PUBLISHING COMPANY THAT WOULD DARE PUBLISH ANY STUPID SHIT THAT HE HAD TO SAY.

So please. Just go away.

Good Monday!

Happy Monday everybody! I thought I would start this off with a humorous little transcript from a joke on last week's Real Time with Bill Mahr...

"The one part of the economy that is doing well I swear to god is the gun industry. Since Obama got elected gun sales have shot up because there's a, you know, this is, I read this in USA Today, a survey of Americans, how they felt about Obama's election, 67% proud, 59% excited, 30% pessimistic, 27% afraid. So we'd like to f#%k with those people right now. The people who are afraid. A little something we call Obama World.

In Obama World all guns will be confiscated and melted down to make a giant statue of Allah.
The National Anthem will be changed from the Star Spangled Banner to Gin and Juice.
The colors of the American flag will be changed from red, white and blue to black, black and leopard print. The Department of Health and Human services will now be the Department of Earth, Wind and Fire.

And the Obama Cabinet will consist of Shaft, Dolemite, Foxy Brown, Mandingo, Cleopatra Jones, Superfly and Blacula. And finally the government will listen in on your phone calls, search you without a warrant, arrest you without charges and hold you without a trial. Oh wait, that's now."


...Funny.

Six Sinister Cartoons: Fox's Bread and Butter

Everyone has had this kind of discussion at least one time or another: Simpsons vs. Family Guy, why King of the Hill should be cancelled, or how American Dad just doesn't compare to the Seth McFarlane original. When you think of the modern adult cartoon, you probably think of Fox...and you should. Fox is great at producing and continuing great animated television series for an older demographic (compared to Yu-Gi-Oh fans), and have continued that tradition for almost two decades, starting with the Simpsons. One of the only networks to nearly outdo Fox with only one animated series is Comedy Central, and I think you know why. So I thought I would take the time and rate what I believe to be the six most popular adult animated series' of our generation, starting with #6 (the least entertaining) to #1 (the most)...

#6 - American Dad!: Obviously, this is the weakest and least comedic of the bunch. American Dad! is like the Natural Ice of cartoons...the beer that nobody really wants to drink but will if its the only thing available. It is definitely the worst of the McFarlane creations so far (I have yet to see The Cleveland Show. Is it even out?). It does have its moments. The two funniest characters on the show aren't even human, and involve a talking neo-nazi fish and a flamboyant, metrosexual (we think) alien. Still, I have seen worse when it comes to cartoons, and would definitely prefer American Dad! to everything else that is not on this list.

#5 - The Simpsons: I know what you're thinking...why the hell is The Simpson at #5? Believe me, I really didn't want to do it, but when thinking about it, it kind of has to happen. The Simpsons has been in a terrible slump for the last five to six seasons. If we lived in a time where the jokes and plotlines were akin to Season 4, it would easily make #1 on the list. But even The Simpson Movie can't give the show enough redemption to get it higher. And when I really think about the latest episodes, I kind of wonder if The Simpsons should be on a top list at all...

#4 - King of the Hill: I'm probably one of the only people to think this, but I believe King of the Hill is one of the most consistently funny animated series out there. It never tries to be anything more than it is. It's modest in its jokes and doesn't really get too bizarre. Most people who don't like it probably don't because it's too real and not "cartooney" enough. But remember...that's how The Simpsons used to be, before it started chasing the Family Guy wagon. Hank Hill has become as iconic a character as Homer Simpson, and the "Dammit, Bobby" line is universal. Also, you have to give props to Mike Judge, creator of the series, for all of his work. The man is a genius, and even though a lot of his stuff doesn't get totally mainstream, he's still awesome.

#3 - Futurama: You have to love it. Professor Farnsworth is one of the funniest cartoon characters of our generation. Bender is what I aspire to be. It doesn't get the credit that it should, but has certainly developed a significant following which has led to three new movies with three hilarious, independent plots. This show has more pop culture references than Family Guy, they just aren't presented in such a wacky fashion. I'd almost put it higher on the list, but you can't escape the funny of the next two...

#2 - Family Guy: Do I even need to say anything? Screw the plotlines. Hell, throw out anything that makes sense. Family Guy tells amazing non-sequential jokes and they just get us. When I was a college student I thrived on Family Guy to help me release the stress of college life and it always worked. Even today, if I can't find anything good on, I always default to Family Guy episodes. The show is absolutely hilarious. I have heard from certain friends that they think it gets old after awhile, but I have to disagree. I NEED pop culture references, and badly, and Family Guy never fails to provide. Seth McFarlane's #1 baby boy destroys his American Dad!, and rightfully so. And finally...

#1 - South Park: It's funny that every show on the list is a Fox animated series, but the #1 listing comes from Comedy Central. Nothing beats this show. When you are tired and pissed off at something, I'm almost sure that South Park has an episode that will help you feel a little retribution about it. Think Paris Hilton is a stupid, spoiled whore? So do Matt Stone and Trey Parker. Love being a gamer but hate those who sap all the fun out of it? Get pwned. Even last night's episode dared to challenge the popularity of those damn High School Musical movies, that is every becoming so popular, but really don't make any fucking sense at all. While not every episode is as funny as certain others, South Park never quits at destroying society and reinventing it. I love it, and hope it continues to succeed.

Just So Confused...

The election is over. I know this. We won. I won. I'm very happy about it. But there are still a few things concerning it that I am confused with. The biggest of which is why any strong proud Democrat or liberal would have voted for the McCain ticket. I have two close friends, who WERE some of the proudest Democrats and supporters of all equal social rights, who wound up voting for John McCain and Sarah Palin. And I just don't understand.

I understand that everyone has a choice. I understand that it's really none of my business, and that it seemingly doesn't even matter now because we DID win. But still, it bothers me. What did the McCain campaign have to offer that would make them not vote for Barack Obama. To put it bluntly...NOTHING. So the only reason I can think of not voting for Obama is because of his color, or because of his middle name, or because he is just different. Because if that's not it...I just can't figure it out.

John McCain is a liar, a mudslinger. When things started to look bad, he threw out the words "socialist, marxist, and terrorist," instead of just focusing on the positive qualities of his own campaing (there were few, but they existed). Could that have been what dissuaded my friends? Were they really ignorant enough to think that Obama is a communist? I hope not.

I know it's not because of social aspects. They believe that homosexuals should have the same rights as everyone. Hell, they believe EVERYONE should be equal. They also believe in a woman's right to choose. So they wouldn't have voted for McCain because of his ignorant one-sided religious views on social issues, could it? I don't think so.

Could it have been Sarah Palin? Because she's hot? Because that's about it. She didn't know Africa was a continent. She couldn't name one publication that she cyclically read to keep up with world events. She lied about everything includign the Bridge To Nowhere, in which she claimed she never took the money. Well, she took the pork monies, she just didn't spend it on the bridge. Not to mention, she was and as far as I know currently is facing corruption charges for pressuring one of her government workers to fire her sister's ex-husband. She is trailer trash. She is an idiot and incapable of leading. She is incompetent. And the fact that John McCain would even pick someone like her for his Vice Presidential candidate is disgusting. He didn't pick her for what she could do for the country...he picked her for Hilary voters. For the woman vote. Because that's all she represents...being a female. If you look at her for anything else...well...be prepared to stretch the imagination. So they couldn't have voted for the McCain ticket because of her, right?

So why was it? Was Barack not liberal enough, because as far as I'm concerned, he's the most liberal presidential-elect we've ever had. Was it because of the names he was called that they believed?

No. I really don't know. I can't muster why any strong liberal would vote for John McCain. And I know I really sound like a baby but this kind of thing matters to me. When you live in a red state surrounded by Obama-haters, its nice to know that someone has your back, that someone feels the way you feel, that someone believes in social justice like you do. I feel like I've been betrayed, even though in the long run it's not going to matter. I feel cheated. I feel lied to. And I feel like I know them less, which is sad, because these beliefs and morals, these values, is why I love them. One of these people I built an entire friendship with based on the first conversation we ever had about President Bill Clinton at a fraternity party.

So it's hard for me. I should take their voting record with a grain of salt. I just want to know why, not just them, but why ANYONE would legitmately vote for the McCain campaign, if you exclude social issues out of it. Why?

WTF?

What I am about to post should be the defining example of how crazy Right-Wingnuts can be...and how they should be completely ignored and actually exiled from the Planet Earth. A right-wing lawyer and blogger, John Hinderacker (pronounced Hinder-Rocker), has recently written a post on his blog regarding the rhetoric of Barack Obama. In it, he compares and contrasts Obama's and G.W. Bush's speaking ability. And when I say compares and contrasts, what I really mean to say is Hinderacker basically explains why W. is SUCH A BETTER AND MORE INFORMED SPEAKER THAN OBAMA. Am I in a parallel world? Did I suddenly get dropped into the Marvel Comics universe where anything can happen? Because I don't see Spider-Man or Wolverine anywhere. I mean seriously, this guy has the fucking gall to say that W.'s speaking ability (speaking, that involves putting words together and forming coherent sentences) is better than Barack Obama. I can't even find the words. He has literally made me a terrible speaker. I cannot articulate the outrage and infuriation I have toward this man who obviously lives in a fantasy world where Larry Craig DIDN'T have erotic homosexual playtime in an airport bathroom, where Sarah Palin actually proves herself as a worthy Vice Presidential candidate, where John McCain is president-elect, and Rush Limbaugh and Bill O'Reilly host the Tonight Show and Late Night, respectively. Because if he believes he lives in this reality, he would understand the stupidity of his post and how he has completely lost any credibility he had as a political blogger. Also, on a side note, his very name expresses the amount of SUCK he is ble to project...Hinder is a rock band...that sucks. So...yeah. Here is the post:

The Importance of Being Careful
Obama thinks he is a good talker, but he is often undisciplined when he speaks. He needs to understand that as President, his words will be scrutinized and will have impact whether he intends it or not. In this regard, President Bush is an excellent model; Obama should take a lesson from his example. Bush never gets sloppy when he is speaking publicly.
He chooses his words with care and precision, which is why his style sometimes seems halting. In the eight years he has been President, it is remarkable how few gaffes or verbal blunders he has committed. If Obama doesn't raise his standards, he will exceed Bush's total before he is inaugurated.

New Watchmen Posters...

Watchmen is a film based on an award winning graphic novel by Alan Moore, who is actually a registered psychopath. Zack Snyder, of Dawn of the Dead and 300 fame, is the director of the project, which will be released in March of 2009. They have recently revealed a few posters for the film (I won't even go into the plot because it would take all week) and I just wanted to post this one because it actually contains one of my favorite lines in the book. Enjoy!

Some New Symbols I Found for the GOP...

Veterans Day

I just wanted to take the time and remind all of you that today, November 11, is Veterans Day. It is important to remember all the men and women who have served in our country's military defending the freedoms and ways of life that we all probably take for granted. My father was a veteran of Vietnam. He is even buried in a veteran memorial gravesite in my hometown of West Liberty, Kentucky. So if any of the three people that read this thing is a veteran and are or have served in our military forces, I just want to take the time and say thank you so much.

THE SHOWS YOU SHOULD BE WATCHING

5. Fringe
4. The Life and Times of Tim
3. Entourage
2. The Office
1. True Blood

Red River Gorge...And Why Morons Shouldn't Go There...

I am from Morgan County located in the Eastern part of the great Commonwealth of Kentucky. Morgan County is located next to Wolfe County, the home of the beautiful Red River Gorge, and modest tourism attraction for not just the county, but the entire Eastern Kentucky area. I have been there many times although physical activity is not something that I particularly enjoy. But even someone as lazy as I am knows the dangers that comes with camping and visiting Red River Gorge.

The area is very dangerous. Even walking around without paying attention to what is in front you will land 60 to 100 feet down below. Cliffs are everywhere, especially in places that are very hard to notice. A lot of people who camp there are young, and use it as an excuse to party and drink themselves into stupidity in the outdoors. And then problems occur. A lot of problems.

This week there have been three major accidents at the gorge that have caused the death of two individuals and a serious injury on another. All parties involved were under the age of 18. Coincidence? Probably not. Also, the person who was simply injured is from some area in Northern Kentucky. I don't officially know this, but I would assume the morons who get injured or killed at Red River Gorge don't respect the area because they are not from the area and could care less. They're probably just interested in partying, which I guess is okay, if you want to die. I will say this: RED RIVER GORGE IS THE HARBINGER OF DEATH TO PARTIERS. Don't go if you want to drink. Please. Or go. Because if you're that stupid, I'd probably be glad that you are dead.

When going to the Red River Gorge, be prepared. Know where you are, what is around you, and whether or not you think its safe to drink, which, probably isn't. Safety hazard signs are posted everywhere. Please be sure to mind them. Accidents and deaths occur so many times a year at this fucking place I don't see how and why so many people want to go there. Although, a lethargic person such as I can't really imagine why anyone would want to do anything outside.

But please. Just be careful. Don't be a fucking idiot. This message brought to you by Georgie the Bear.

Speaking of Comic Book Movies...

...My Wonder Woman.

New Captain America Director!

Time for some geek out:

Marvel Studios has announced the director for the upcoming Captain America film. This, along with the Thor and Ant-Man films, would fill and presumably complete the roster for the oh-so-anticipated Avengers film, featuring those three characters along with Rober Downey Jr.'s Iron Man and Ed Norton's Hulk.

The director is Joe Johnston. For those unfamiliar, he directed Hidalgo, Jurassic Park III, and October Sky, among others. Not bad, although not terribly impressive when it comes to an icon that would bring death upon him from comic book fans if Johnston fucked up. I hope he can handle it, because Marvel really needs to continue capitalizing on this "comic book movies can be good" thing (Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Spider-Man 1,2, X-Men 1,2, and of course the 15th Greatest Movie of all time according to Empire Magazine, The Dark Knight).

The Big Sleep

Okay. This post has nothing to do with anything going on in the world. It is about me, so to you it is probably boring and pointless. Still, I am amazed by what has happened to me.

Saturday night, I didn't manage to get to sleep until around five in the morning. In my opinion, no big deal. Before my current job with the University of Kentucky, I frequently stayed up late, and would probably be considered an insomniac. Even then, I was able to get out of bed AT LEAST before 3pm. Anyways...

I went to bed around 5AM Sunday morning. I didn't wake up until 9PM Sunday evening. What the hell?

I slept for a total of 16 hours. Without waking up. Without moving. Without seeing daylight. I went to bed, the sky was black. I woke up, the sky was black. What the hell?

I wondered to myself how I would get any rest for work Monday morning. So my wonderful niece Blair gave me some kind of medicine she takes for her knee which knocked me out. So, Monday morning, when I woke up, I had about 24 hours of total sleep. That's right...

I slept for a total of 24 hours. I think I might have died at some point. I'm not sure. Will get back to you. Must go now. Too much energy. Have to go run a marathon...

Halloween Pix

The Dream...

So last night I had this dream. I thought it was kind of interesting. I was at a party. It was very crowded and my date was Sarah Palin. However, she was disgusted with me because of my political views. Or because of how I look. I'm not sure, although I think I remember her saying something about being a Democrat. Anyway...I finally had enough of her bitching. I grabbed her ears with both of my hands, and forced her to kiss me. At first she struggled. Then she struggled less...then less...then less. The she got into it. And then she jumped on top of me. All of a sudden, I was heavy petting with Sarah Palin in the middle of this party. Yeah. I kick ass.

Interpretation: Palin hated to admit that she really loves Democrats and the fact that Barack Obama is now President. I represented Democrats, and her willingness to suck face says to me that she finally embraces the change of the country. Hell yeah.

Hasselbeck Reneges!

I've spoken earlier about how I absolutely cannot stand Elizabeth Hasselbeck and her complete ignorance and idiocy on...well, everything she talks about. So get this:

Hasselbeck, in an interview with USmagazine.com, is quoted as saying that Obama winning was an absolute victory for the United States. This is a little strange, considering the campaigning she did for the McCain campaign. Anyone dumb enough to listen to her or be encouraged by her should be shot. Here is the actual quote:

"No one lost today -- and God knows I fought hard on the other side," Hasselbeck said. "Today is a victory for this country. The first black president. The first black first lady. The first black family. I haven't felt this good ..."

Wow Liz. We all knew that anyways, way back in April. Where the hell were ya then?

Still Far From Equality

I was with a friend yesterday and he said something to me that I actually had never even considered before. We were talking about how he had an argument with a professor one time regarding the rights of homosexuals in this country and whether or not they should be allowed to get married. This friend of mine took the pro side (he's not a Democrat, but he is a very liberal person) and said that one of his main arguments was this:

"Not allowing gays and lesbians to get married is like saying African-Americans should not be allowed to vote."

I thought that was a great argument, one that I had never heard before. Both involve taking away rights of individuals, both involve some kind of bigotry, and both deal with minorities. They are easily comparable.

Now, most will argue that marriage is in the realm/spectrum of religion. But it is more than that, and anyone who thinks otherwise probably doesn't really think a whole lot about it. Marriage is more than just a religious sanctity in this country. There are tax benefits, insurance benefits, banking benefits, and many other financial benefits when two people are married. To deny homosexuals their right to marry is to deny them these benefits. Now, every American should have access to these benefits. It is their right. So, inherently, to deny them marriage liscenses is to deny them their rights. Which is exactly what one would be doing when not allowing African-Americans to vote. So yeah bigots, get pwned.

Top 10 Favorite Politicians

Being that this is such a historic day for the United States of America, I thought I would take the time and list some of my favorite politicians since I usually only talk about Barack Obama. So here ya go...

10. Bill Richardson - The current governor of New Mexico, and my third choice for Democratic candidate for the United States right after Hillary Clinton. He is a very charismatic and knowledgeable Democrat, but most of his expertise went towards his time as Secretary of Energy under Bill Clinton's administration.

09. Joe Biden - The current Vice President elect along with President elect Barack Obama. Was (until recently) the United States Senator from Delaware. Biden is ranked as one of the LEAST wealthiest senators in the United States, and embraces it. He constantly fights for the little guy and has made movements toward helping those of the blue collar more than any other Senator I know.

08. Paul Patton - A former governor of Kentucky and an Eastern Kentuckian himself. His biggest influence in the state was the way he reformed higher education here, especially how it was funded.

07. Walter Blevins - Senator for District 27 which includes Boyd, Elliot, Fleming, Lawrence, and Rowan counties in Kentucky. Big on education and local government. Grew up living not too far down the road so I guess its a neighborly thing as well.

06. John Will Stacy - A great friend of my father's. State Representative in District 71 in Kentucky which includes Menifee, Morgan, Rowan, and Wolfe counties. Held a huge budget review involving education and is heavily involved in tourism issues in Kentucky.

05. Greg Stumbo - Former Attorney General for the Commonwealth of Kentucky. Was a native of Prestonsburg, Ky and another friend of my father's. To me his biggest act is heading one of the largest investigations in America that researched high gas prices and whether or not these prices were being gouged. Has also worked famously with Dateline NBC's To Catch A Predator series which exposes child predators.

04. Bruce Lunsford - Recently ran a campaign for United States Senator in Kentucky against Mitch McConnell, one of the senior Bush lackeys and still supporter. Has campagined for governor twice but lost both. His recent Senate Campaign encouraged Kentucky Democrats to get out there and vote, and not just change the nation with Obama, but start changing the Commonwealth of Kentucky with Lunsford.

03. Hillary Clinton - You know who she is. She's wonderful, smart, strong, independent, and who I voted for to be the Democratic candidate for the United States of America in the primaries of 2008.

02. Bill Clinton - The best president we've had since FDR.

01. Barack Obama - Need I say more?

75 DAYS LEFT OF BUSH...

I wonder what all the comedians out there are going to do...

My Voting Experience...

I have to say, this had to be one of the worst voting experiences that I have ever had. I live in Lexington, Kentucky, but I was always proud to say I was registered as a voter and a proud member in Morgan County, Kentucky. Since I recently graduated, I had to change my address, which put me as a voter registered in Lexington, instead of my Eastern Kentucky hometown of West Liberty. So, this was my first election to vote in Lexington. And man, was it just awful.

The line was incredibly too long, mostly because there was only two voting machines present. Also, the system that was being used was called eSLATE. Now, I am a product of a fast and knowledgable generation when it comes to computers and such, so I had no problem with the machine. But man, if you could only see the looks on some of the faces of the elderly. No wonder it took so long! I must have waited in line for a little under two hours. I started to become frustrated with many young people deciding to just leave and not vote. And I totally understand them. I was inches from just leaving myself, but I had to remind myself that voting is the most important thing a person can do as an American, and it takes little effort. So I decided to stay. Kentucky, of course, went for McCain, and there was no way mine or any other Democrat's vote was going to count in this state. But I think it was still well worth it. Don't you?

Oh, and one other thing. Mitch McConnell won the U.S. Senate race against Bruce Lunsford. That's right. The Commonwealth still gave the seat to the biggest Bush lackey and supporter ever. Year 25. Hell yeah!

It's A Celebration!

I probably don't even need to say anything...but I will. Barack Obama has been elected the 44th President of the United States! After all the smears, all the lies, all the oppression from ignorant conservatives, all the half-truths, all the name calling, all the darkness, after eight years of failed administrative policy, after eight years of Alberto Gonzales, after eight years of FEMA, of failed economic policy, of witholding truths, of a war gone sour, and of the worst president in the history of the United States, George W. Bush, of being hated and unsupported by the rest of the world, the United States of America is finally back on track with a president who inspires hope over fear, change over ignorance, and brains over religion. Congratulations to the Obama campaign managers and workers, who despite having to deal with a McCain campaign that lied about everything from Obama's religion to his stance on economic policy, for holding true to what they believe in, truth and hope. Congrats to them for not getting involved in the smearing of politicians that the McCain campaign so happily and sickly got involved in. And most importantly, congrats to Barack Obama for remaining cool, for keeping us inspired, for show McCain courtesy and respect even though he refused to show it to you. This is a great and historic day for America...

And for me, as I not only get a wonderful president, but also $50, which I have yet to receive...

It Just Looks Right...

Like a friend at work said to me...It Just Looks Right. I have a feeling I am going to be $50 richer come Wednesday.

Phoenix Not Rising...And Hasn't Been Since Gladiator...

So, one of the biggest and most important pieces of news bits has recently come to light on the main pages of CNN, Fox News, and MSNBC during the most historical and imporant presidential races to happen in a long time...Joaquin Phoenix is quitting acting...wait...

Okay, so maybe its not that big. But come on! Aren't you going to miss that ugly face everytime you see him on screen? I know as a more heavy set fellow it certainly made me feel better to look at Joaquin Phoenix. While watching his movies I would sit and think to myself..."Hmmm. I guess being rich and famous still doesn't make you beautiful on the outside..." Kind of made me feel good for being poor.

When I think of Joaquin Phoenix (that is to say 'if I EVER think of Joaquin Phoenix) I think of...uh...Russell Crowe stomping his ass...how I no longer think Reese Witherspoon is attractive for sucking that disgusting face of his...how being cast next to Marky Mark even makes his acting look good...and finally and most importantly, his deceased and yet still more talented brother River.

I will miss you Mr. Phoenix. And believe me, I will be sure to buy tons of copies of your shitty band's music. Well, maybe not buy, just download. Well, maybe not download fully, just skim. Ah fuck it. I think I'll just stick with Billy Bob...

Bengals Finally Got One!

I had said earlier on to some of my closest friends that I really did not believe the Cincinatti Bengals would win one game this season. They all looked at me like I was crazy, like that would be impossible within the NFL. But even though I am a huge Bengals fan, I really didn't see it happening. And I was wrong.

The Cincinatti Bengals defeated the Jacksonville Jaguars 21 to 19 yesterday. Ocho Cinco had two touchdown catches with 312 yards gained by the team, which was second next to the Giants. Congratulations for proving me wrong guys! Now stopping making it so hard to be a Bengals fan!

One More Day...